Excerpts from the book “I believe in love”.
By Father Jean C.J. d’Elbee
DAY 20
PART TWO
FRATERNAL CHARITY
WHAT DOES OUR LORD SEE IN OUR ACTIONS? THE INTENTIONS WHICH MOTIVATE US. IT IS THAT WHICH GIVES VALUE TO OUR ACTIONS. BUT THE GOOD INTENTIONS OF OTHERS SO OFTEN ESCAPE OUR NOTICE. DO NOT JUDGE INTENTIONS, I ASSURE YOU, IT HAS HAPPENED TO ME THAT, HAVING ASCRIBED A BAD INTENTION TO SOMEONE, I HAVE LATER HAD THE PROOF, NEAT AND CLEAR, THAT I WAS WRONG, THAT HE HAD SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT IN MIND THAN WHAT I THOUGHT. WHAT A LESSON!
AS MUCH AS YOU CAN, ASCRIBE GOOD INTENTIONS TO YOUR NEIGHBOR. DO NOT PUT FINAL LABELS ON OTHERS, AS IF NO CORRECTION WERE POSSIBLE.
LITTLE THERESE WROTE, “WHEN I WANT TO INCREASE IN MYSELF MY LOVE OF NEIGHBOR , ESPECIALLY WHEN THE DEVIL TRIES TO PUT BEFORE THE EYES OF MY SOUL THE FAULTS OF THIS OR THAT SISTER WHO IS LESS APPEALING TO ME, I HASTEN TO SEEK OUT HER VIRTUES, HER GOOD DESIRES. I TELL MYSELF THAT IF I HAVE SEEN HER FALL ONE TIME, SHE MAY WELL HAVE UNDERGONE A GREAT MANY VICTORIES THAT SHE HIDES THROUGH HUMILITY, AND THAT EVEN WHAT APPEARS AS A FAULT TO ME COULD VERY WELL BE AN ACT OF VIRTUE BECAUSE OF THE INTENTION. AH, I UNDERSTAND NOW THAT PERFECT CHARITY CONSISTS OF ENDURING THE FAULTS OF OTHERS, NOT AT BEING AT ALL ASTONISHED AT THEIR WEAKNESS, OF BEING EDIFIED BY THE SMALLEST ACTS OF VIRTUE WHICH ONE SEES THEM PRACTICE.”
WHEN ST. FRANCIS DE SALES REFUSED SOMEONE SOMETHING, THE PERSON LEFT JUST AS SATISFIED AS IF HE HAD BEEN GRANTED IT, FOR HE REFUSED WITH SUCH GOODNESS, GIVING HIS REASONS AND SHOWING HIS REGRET AT NOT BEING ABLE TO PLEASE. THEY LEFT AS CONTENT WITH HIS NO AS IF THEY HAD RECEIVED A YES.
LISTEN TO ST. PAUL:
"BLESS THOSE WHO PERSECUTE YOU: BLESS AND NOT CURSE. REJOICE WITH THOSE WHO REJOICE; WEEP WITH THOSE WHO WEEP, BEING OF ONE MIND, ONE TOWARD ANOTHER, NOT MINDING HIGH THINGS, BUT CONSENTING TO THE HUMBLE. BE NOT WISE IN YOUR OWN CONCEITS, TO NO MAN RENDERING EVIL FOR EVIL, PROVIDING GOOD THINGS, NOT ONLY IN THE SIGHT OF GOD , BUT ALSO IN THE SIGHT OF ALL MEN. IF IT IS POSSIBLE, AS MUCH AS IS IN YOU, HAVE PEACE WITH ALL MEN….BE NOT OVERCOME BY EVIL, BUT OVERCOME EVIL BY GOOD.”
OBVIOUSLY YOU ARE NOT EXPECTED TO EXPERIENCE THE SAME FEELINGS IN YOUR HEART TOWARD A FRIEND AS TOWARD SOMEONE WHO WISHES YOU EVIL. IT IS ALSO CLEAR THAT IF YOUR OPINION IS ASKED WITH A VIEW SAY, TO GRANTING SOMEONE A POSITION FOR EXAMPLE, YOU ARE OBLIGED TO GIVE AN OBJECTIVE EVALUATION OF HIM. IT ALSO MIGHT HAPPEN THAT THE DEFENSE OF THE TRUTH AND JUSTICE WOULD BE IN QUESTION, OR THAT THE DUTY OF FRATERNAL CORRECTION WOULD BE IMPOSED UPON YOU, WHICH IS AN ACT OF CHARITY.
THERE ARE EVEN HOLY KINDS OF ANGER. BUT ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT NOTHING TROUBLES THE HEARTS, NOTHING TROUBLES JESUS IN US LIKE DISSENSION AND DISCORD.
THINK TOO, OF THE HAVOC THAT CAN BE WROUGHT BY SPEAKING ILL OF ANOTHER, OR EVEN BY DETRACTION, BECAUSE IT IS MORE DIFFICULT TO SET RIGHT. BEWARE THAT A GRUDGE NURTURED VOLUNTARILY CAN BRING ABOUT GRAVE MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND AT TIMES CAN CREATE AN ABYSS OR ERECT A MOUNTAIN OF ICE BETWEEN TWO PERSONS. NO ONE IS COMPLETELY IN CONTROL OF HIS FIRST REACTIONS, BUT YOU MUST RECOLLECT YOURSELF VERY QUICKLY. “TO PARDON AN INJUSTICE RECEIVED IS TO HEAL THE WOUND IN YOUR OWN HEART,” SAID ST. VINCENT DE PAUL.
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“TO PARDON AN INJUSTICE RECEIVED IS TO HEAL THE WOUND IN YOUR OWN HEART,” SAID ST. VINCENT DE PAUL.
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