Excerpts from the book “I believe in love”.
By Father Jean C.J. d’Elbee
DAY 7
PART 2
UNSHAKABLE CONFIDENCE
WHEN WE SEE OURSELVES TO BE SO WEAK, SO IMPOTENT, ALWAYS FALLING INTO THE SAME SINS, WE ARE TEMPTED TO SAY TO OURSELVES, “CAN IT BE POSSIBLE THAT JESUS DOES NOT GROW WEARY OF THIS?”
WE HAVE ALL HAD THIS TEMPTATION AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER. “I HAVE PROMISED HIM SO MUCH, I HAVE MADE SO MANY RESOLUTIONS, AND I ALWAYS FALL AGAIN; IT IS IMPOSSIBLE THAT HE DOES NOT GET TIRED OF IT”.
IT IS A KIND OF BLASPHEMY TO SAY THAT, BECAUSE IT IS TO LIMIT A MERCY WHICH HAS NO LIMIT. IT IS TO DOUBT THE PATIENCE, THE INDULGENCE, AND THE UNTIRING CLEMENCY OF JESUS. IT IS NOT HE WHO GROWS WEARY OF US; IT IS WE WHO GROW WEARY OF LOOKING AT OUR UGLINESS.
DURING THE APPARITIONS OF OUR LADY OF PONTMAIN, THE CHILDREN SPELLED OUT, LETTER BY LETTER, THE WORDS THEY SAW BEING WRITTEN IN THE SKY UNDER THE FEET OF THE BLESSED VIRGIN.
AT THE WORD ALLOWS (SE LAISSE), THE ADULTS, WHO SAW NOTHING, SAID TO THEM, “YOU MUST BE WRONG; IT MUST BE ‘MY SON IS WEARY’ (SE LASSE), AND NOT, ‘MY SON ALLOWS…’ BUT INSTEAD OF “MY SON HAS HAD ENOUGH” IT WAS---OH DIVINE TENDERNESS----“MY SON ALLOWS HIMSELF TO BE MOVED”.
WHY DO WE HAVE THIS BASIC TENDENCY, THIS FIRST IMPULSE TO THINK THAT JESUS IS DISSATISFIED?”
EVEN A FALL STRENGTHENS US IF WE REPENT OF IT, SINCE JESUS BRINGS GOOD OUT OF EVIL. GO TO HIM, PICKING YOURSELF UP EACH TIME MORE HUMBLE AND EACH TIME MORE OVERFLOWING WITH CONFIDENT LOVE. IF YOU MAKE EACH SIN AN OCCASION FOR YOU TO KISS THE WOUND OF HIS HEART WITH REPENTANCE AND CONFIDENCE, EACH SIN WILL BECOME A RUNG IN THE LADDER BY WHICH YOU ASCEND IN LOVE. FROM MISERY TO MISERY WE GO FROM MERCY TO MERCY.
I HAVE ALREADY TOLD YOU HOW LITTLE THERESE LIVED, AND EXPRESSED THIS DOCTRINE, BUT I COME BACK TO HER AGAIN, FOR TRULY SHE IS THE ONE WHO TAUGHT IT.
SHE TOOK PLEASURE IN RECOUNTING HER INFIDELITIES TO JESUS, IN HER BOLD ABANDONMENT, TO ATTRACT MORE FULLY, TO GAIN A GREATER HOLD ON THE LOVE OF HIM WHO DID NOT COME TO CALL THE JUST BUT THE SINNERS.
AFTER HAVING SHOWN IMPATIENCE TO ONE OF HER SISTERS, SHE WROTE TO MOTHER AGNES, “I AM MUCH HAPPIER TO HAVE BEEN IMPERFECT, THAN IF, UPHELD BY GRACE, I HAD BEEN A MODEL OF SWEETNESS. IT DOES ME SO MUCH GOOD TO SEE THAT JESUS IS ALWAYS JUST AS GENTLE, JUST AS TENDER WITH ME. WHY DOES HE NOT SCOLD ME?”
SHE RECOGNIZED VERY QUICKLY THAT THE MORE WE ADVANCE ON THE WAY OF PERFECTION, THE FURTHER WE BELIEVE OURSELVES FROM THE GOAL.
SHE CRIED, “HOW HAPPY I AM TO SEE MYSELF IMPERFECT AND HAVING SO GREAT A NEED OF RECEIVING THE MERCY OF GOD AT THE MOMENT OF DEATH!”
IN FACT IN THE VERY ARMS OF DEATH SHE STATES:
"INSTEAD OF REJOICING IN MY DRYNESS, I OUGHT TO ATTRIBUTE IT TO MY LACK OF FERVOR AND FIDELITY. I OUGHT TO BE DISTRESSED AT SLEEPING DURING MY PRAYERS AND ACTS OF THANKSGIVING. WELL I AM NOT DISTRESSED. I THINK LITTLE CHILDREN PLEASE THEIR PARENTS AS MUCH AS THEY SLEEP AS WHEN THEY ARE AWAKE”.
I DECIDED TO QUOTE THIS, BECAUSE I HAVE FOUND SO MANY, MANY SOULS, WHO ATTRIBUTE THEIR DRYNESS AND THEIR TEMPTATIONS AGAINST THE FAITH TO THEIR LACK OF FERVOR, AND THUS ALLOW THEIR IMPULSE TOWARD JESUS TO BE BROKEN, ALTHOUGH HE OFTEN PERMITS THIS TO HAPPEN IN ORDER TO IMMERSE THEM ONCE AGAIN IN HUMILITY AND TO GIVE THEM THE OCCASION FOR THIS CHILDLIKE CONFIDENCE IN THE SIMPLICITY WHICH MAKES HIS HEART REJOICE.
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IT IS NOT HE WHO GROWS WEARY OF US; IT IS WE WHO GROW WEARY OF LOOKING AT OUR UGLINESS.
Christe eleison!
GO TO HIM, PICKING YOURSELF UP EACH TIME MORE HUMBLE AND EACH TIME MORE OVERFLOWING WITH CONFIDENT LOVE.
†Amen†
"... LITTLE CHILDREN PLEASE THEIR PARENTS AS MUCH AS THEY SLEEP AS WHEN THEY ARE AWAKE."
Glory be to the Father, to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning is now, and ever shall be, world without end.
†Amen†
“HOW HAPPY I AM TO SEE MYSELF IMPERFECT AND HAVING SO GREAT A NEED OF RECEIVING THE MERCY OF GOD AT THE MOMENT OF DEATH!”
AMEN
Amen.
With love +
Amen.
Amen.
Amen.
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